This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
