I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Randomize
