So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
Randomize
