who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
Randomize
