At least make sure they are 18
Why
it was like his penis was on wheels.
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
I don't know. I just have an affinity for nudity when I'm drunk.
How the hell am I supposed to tell that to a group of eight year olds?! It was three in the afternoon for fucks sake!
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
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