Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
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