Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize
