Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
Randomize
