So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
Also a shrinking boner emoji would be helpful
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
Randomize
