So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
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