did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
Fuck me I smell like cheese
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
