Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
I promise not to pretend to be Jesus and take the wheel. But to my credit you shouldn't be saying that while I'm that drunk and we are in a car.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
I had to cum in my sink.
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
Randomize
