the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
Last night when I was hammered I set a reminder to tell you that your boobs are my favorite ones in the world, so this is me giving you that message.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
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