she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
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