don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
I'm eating tomato paste and drinking banana juice that is expired. Can we please get groceries tonight?
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
Randomize
