I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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