new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
