There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
I'm hiding in my office refusing to turn the light on holding puke down stealing and shoveling down the meeting snacks and regretting my poor life choices. goldfish crackers are like crack to me right now. how is your day?
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
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