Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
Randomize
