i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
i either got mauled last night by a velociraptor or an angry lipstick lesbian. could have been both
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize
