You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
Randomize
