the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
The oven caught fire. I put it out, but called the fire department just to make sure it was okay since the smoke wasn't going away
You just wanted to meet firemen
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize
