What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
Randomize