i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
The air was thick with penises
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
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