he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
These 25 People Forgave their Significant Others for Saying Stupid Things
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.