I'm drive I can fine osifer
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
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