Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
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