Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
The Olympian is in my bed
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
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