real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
Randomize
