a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
Accidentally texted co-worker instead of bf “I’m wfh tomrw. Nooner? 💦”
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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