He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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