Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
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