So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize