she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
You do realize it’s only a matter of time before I have a bad day and come home with an alpaca?
Randomize
