Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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