You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize
