yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.