Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
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