Pissed on my Blackberry at the Astros game. Wish me luck explaining that one at work.
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
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