if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Randomize
