Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
birth control should be required to get into college
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
Randomize
