Whoa Z and x make the same sound
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
I'm not sure why, but my salad smells like a Big Mac. Or maybe that's just the smell of yesterday's, seeping through my skin.
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Randomize
