Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
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