This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
Also, there's definitely not a non-hilarious way to ask to stick something up your butt.
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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