this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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