is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
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