thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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