oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
The Olympian is in my bed
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
Randomize
