oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
Randomize
