why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
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